Understanding decision-making: developing positive decision-making, life skills

Hello again, dear reader. During yesterday's discussion, we pontificated on the power of choice and how making decisions (at least good ones) can lead to a higher quality of life. So for today's discussion, I thought we would pontificate on consequences. Their power, their psychology, as well as learning how to successfully deal with the consequences of choices in a healthy and productive manner, so that dear reader. We can all successfully strive to reach our highest potential and make as many well-informed, healthy decisions with positive and productive consequences as possible...


Consider this: In three weeks time, you have a big presentation to a long-hoped-for new client. Three weeks is plenty of time, though, so each day you sit down at your computer and, instead of working on your presentation, play game after game of Desktop Tower Defense. Three weeks and a day later, you’re clearing out your desk after being let go for failing to get that big wished-for client.
Or this: It’s the night before the Big Exam; for weeks you’ve been skipping class or, when you did show up, wiling away your classroom hours by texting back-and-forth with your friends. Now, with imminent failure facing you, you decide to go blow off steam with your friends. Hung-over and unprepared, of course you fail the Big Exam, which means you fail the class and, since your GPA has slipped to an unacceptable level, you lose your athletic scholarship. You won’t be back in the fall.
Or this: The Coach purse in the display window looks so pretty, so alluring, that you just have to have it. It will pull you up a little short on this month’s budget, but you’ve been good lately, right? Surely you can tighten your belt a little in exchange for treating yourself to something nice? Three weeks later, the transmission craps out on your car. With no money in the bank, you’re forced to use public transportation for the first time in your life. Not knowing the schedule very well, you’re late to work every day for a week; on payday, the boss tells you that they won’t need your services any more.
This is not a post about making bad choices, though you’d be forgiven if that’s the lesson you’ve drawn from it so far. No, it’s not so much about making poor choices as it is about making a certain kind of choice, a choice made in the moment, for the moment, with little or no thought to consequences.
This kind of choice doesn’t always result in the kind of dire circumstances I’ve described above. Sometimes, everything works out fine. Occasionally, last-minute strokes of luck even pull our bacon out of the fire.
That’s not the point. The point is this: You can choose your actions, or you can choose your consequences, but you can’t choose both.
All the stories above are stories of people choosing their actions. Once you choose your action, the consequences follow from that choice with a will of their own. Choose drinking over studying? The consequence is liable to be failure. Choose hanging with your friends over seeing your child’s spring recital? The consequence is liable to be the loss of your child’s trust, and possibly the lost respect of your spouse and other family. Choose to drive too fast to show off? There’s a good chance your action will lead to accident, injury, even death for you or someone else.
Or you can choose your consequences. If the outcome you want is success in your job, you probably have a pretty good idea of the actions you need to take to get it. Certainly prioritizing work over goofing off is part of it! If academic success is the consequence you’d like to enjoy, your plan of action is also pretty clear cut: a certain amount of study and organization is demanded. Maybe you’d like to build a loving, positive relationship with your children? You’re going to have to make a certain amount of time for that, even at the expense of other things you might like to be able to do.
You only get to pick one or the other, though. You can’t choose to drink and party and have the consequence be automatic success. You can’t choose to slack off at work and have the consequence be promotion. You don’t get to choose to spend your money frivolously and as a consequence have plenty in reserve when emergency strikes.
Now, we can’t always act according to clear-cut consequences, and certainly it’s worthwhile to live in the moment now and again. Which brings me to the last and most important part of all this: whatever you do, own your choice. If you choose dumbly, take full responsibility for the consequences of that choice. If you choose to act towards a desired outcome rather than deviate from that path, own that too – don’t kick yourself, or let others kick you, for your commitment.
It’s not so bad that people act in the moment and make poor choices; what makes it ugly is when they’re shocked, shocked I tell you, to find that they didn’t achieve the outcome they’d desired. Don’t be that person: if you can’t accept the consequences of your actions, don’t do them! No matter what you do, remember: the choice is yours.

Making wise decisions is a life skill

In order for us to learn a skill, there must be someone qualified to teach it. This means that our ability to make decisions will be strongly affected by the person we learned that ability from. If our parents lacked good decision making skills, it puts us at a distinct disadvantage.

To compound the problem, this important skill is not taught in schools. Young children are asked to make decisions without being given the skills to do so. The results of this educational blunder are all too obvious. Thankfully, we can all improve our ability to make decisions with the application of a few basic principles.

What influence the process of making decisions? 

One of the reasons people struggle when it comes to making decisions is that there are so many things to consider. We have our personal wants, financial impact, the effect on our friends and family, and so on. This alone can be overwhelming.

Then there’s the pressure from outside influences. For example, advertisers work very hard and use every psychological trick in the book to influence our decisions in their favor.

Are you getting more confused?

Once we really look at all of the different aspects of making decisions, we can see why so many struggle with this life skill. In fact, the seeming complexity of the process can easily lead to procrastination and indecision.

Of course, the purpose of this article is to simplify the process of making decisions. So, now that we’ve examined some of the reasons why decision making can seem so complicated, let’s simplify the daylights out of it.

The real basis for making better decisions

The most important key to making wise decisions is CONSEQUENCES! Every single decision you have ever made, or will ever make, has consequences. Once we learn to evaluate our decisions based on consequences, all the other considerations fall neatly into place. It’s that simple.

Even your internal sense of right and wrong will be satisfied if you apply this simple process: Follow your decisions to their logical conclusion BEFORE you make them. Ask simple questions like: If I do this, what will be the likely result? If I choose this course, what are the consequences going to be? Make your decisions based solely on the consequences and you will be amazed at the way it changes your life.

Our life is the expression of our decisions and indecision

The life you are leading today is the result of past decisions and indecision. If you don’t like your current situation, change the way you make decisions. Many people make decisions based on instant gratification with no regard for long term consequences. This is what I call the Kamikaze approach to life. It’s the opposite of wisdom.

Others blame their situation, rather than accepting responsibility. In this case, their actions are being hindered by their excuses. Then there are those who postpone making decisions because they are waiting for the right circumstances. In reality, that is just one aspect of an avoidance technique called procrastination.

Be wise, when making decisions don’t over complicate it

Regardless of the way you’ve made decisions in the past, you can start making wise decisions now. All you need to do is, think before you decide. Before you make any decision, always start by considering the consequences. This simple practice will help you avoid untold pain and regret.

Soon, others will marvel at your wisdom, as your life remodels itself around the beneficial consequences of your wise decisions.

As always, thanks for listening there will be more to come soon guaranteed